yawkaw3
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 03/22/03
Posts: 1193
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Does your husband/wife/girlfriend/boyfriend/etc. know that you order prescription drugs online?
I recently broke up with my girlfriend, who had no idea, though she did once sign for a package from "Pharmanet," and I told her it was my allergy medication being shipped from my health insurance company, so I could get a 90 day supply with one copay. 
How about the rest of you? I've noticed mixed stories on the boards.
-yawkaw
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clark116
Enthusiast
Reged: 12/11/02
Posts: 221
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My hubby does not know ... but he's happy to dip into my hydros when his back is bothering him ... he just never asked any questions!
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I LOVE THIS FORUM!!!
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Greycie
Old Hand
Reged: 07/08/03
Posts: 461
Loc: Pacific NorthWest
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My ex-boyfriend knew- I told him because he was often concerned about the extensive pain I was enduring. Though, he thought that would be a neat reason for him to dip into my stash, until I told him how much they cost and that his hands were not to touch them!! LOL! Sweet lad, he respected that.
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"I may not agree with what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it." - Voltaire
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ohd_37
Board Addict
Reged: 08/05/03
Posts: 399
Loc: up north, yankee all the way
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Since we are both chronic pain paitents, the answer would be yes.
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radgirl
Journeyman
Reged: 04/02/03
Posts: 54
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Thats a good response allergies. My husband had both his feet and ankles broke last year so now he is a chronic pain patient himself. Know he can relate to me..
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quincy
Board Addict
Reged: 11/07/02
Posts: 333
Loc: pacific northwest
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Yes, my last boyfriend knew about Op's and I will never tell another what I do!! He is now my ex, since mainly he never thought that I needed pills and called me a junkie. I guess paying 300$ for a consult and medications is a lot, but when you are only 26 and you can't get out of bed to work or take care of your children, any price seems reasonable to pay. This jerk also told my parents who also now think I am a junkie, which is really funny since my mother has fibromyalgia as well as I do and takes huge amounts of narcotics for pain. Before she found her PM doc, she pretty much doctor shopped and got called a junkie herself by many doctors and discharged from their care. You would think a mother would be sympathetic of her daughter with fibro, but she seems to think that my case is like a cold you can just "get over" if you are strong enough. Well, no I have to hear stories of how much she suffered with pain, but despite that she raised two daughters, kept a spotless house and walked three miles a day. I guess the fact that she had a husband to work and support her dosent' mean anything. She can't figure out why I can't DO EVERYTHING that others my age can. I work full-time in healthcare, have a seven year old boy which I raise on my own without a dime of child support and have had some really rotten realationships in my life. Stress plays a huge role in my illness, let me tell you.
Anyways this subject has been on my mind, because only a few days ago my life went to hell and suddenly my "drug use" is the hot topic in the family. On Friday I was putting my boyfriends things away. He was at a friends house trying to get away from me I guess, since he hasn't been very nice lately. Anyways I grabbed his backpack and was putting it away when I got a compulsion to look inside of it. I don't know why I did, something told me to look and see if I could get a clue as to why he's been acting so funny towards me lately. Well, I wish I wouldn't have. I found some pictures of him and two girls!! They weren't really sex or anything, but it was enough to see that when a man has his shirt off and is kissing both of them, that he is not exactly having a platonic relationship with these girls. Well, I have to say that I lost it just a little bit. My neighbor heard me screaming and came over to see what was up. I can only say that no woman (or man) should ever have to see thier loved one cheat like that. Its wrong and hurts so much. I can only say that he wanted me to find them, as an excuse to finally leave.
This dosen't really have anything to do with OP's, but while I yelled at him he actually said that I am "no fun" anymore, that the pills are the most important thing in my life and the usual bull**** men give you when they get caught with their pants down. He blamed me. Oh, but wait, thats not all!! He called my mother when he realized I was really mad and wouldn't bring his "things" to his "new house". Well, I can't help a man who does this to me. Who uses his sick girlfriends illness and medications as an excuse to have a threesome. My mother got involved and pretty much said the same things. That I was no good, what did I expect by spending 300$ on medicine when I should have spent it on him?!! She actually said this. The part that really bothered me was the fact that now she is threatening to take my child away from me. Now, I have a PM doctor and haven't used an OP in months. I have missed a lot of work, but I never asked either one of them to support me. Why do they think they can judge me? Most of all, why am I a bad mother because I take narcotics. Incidentally I take 15mgs methadone four times a day-thats it. Previously I was taking Norco, Valium and Ultram.
So basically my life has been ripped apart in the span of a few days. The main reason any of them can give me is pills. While there are many underlying issues here, they choose to focus on this. I absoleutly will never forgive my parents for even saying they will try to get my son away from me. I may not win mother of the year, but my son is alright. He is fed, clothed, not neglected. He has friends, plays sports and is bright. While he has ADHD and takes Ritalin and is a slow reader, those are things that won't cause permanent damage if we stay on top of them. I can't understand why these people are doing this.
Do you think that if I had to go to court over this, could they get custody because I ordered some Vicoden from the internet? Sorry, this is turning into a huge epic. I have been really upset and scared over this. I just want to see what you all think. Oh-- and today I found out that I may not have a job next week. Someone else was hired for my position!! My God I don't know what else could happen this week. I have lost everything I had and loved and they are trying to take the only thing I have left. Pray Pray Pray I keep telling myself. I guess I have to if I want to keep my sanity.
Sarah
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toe
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 10/09/02
Posts: 1422
Loc: MidWest USA
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Yup. my SO knows. I don't know what kind of health insurance you have as a student, but she would have wiped out a year's worth of prescription insurance if we had not been able to order nexium from importeddrugs.com
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"It's the end of the World as We Know it. . ."
-REM "and I'm seeking asylum in Canada"-toe
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537
Threadhead
Reged: 12/08/01
Posts: 762
Loc: west coast CA
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Quincy, I just wanted to say how sorry I am about how everyone is treating you. Nobody deserves that, especially that kind of grief from their own parents. Keep your focus on your little boy. He'll be the one to give you strength to get through. As far as my husband knowing, unfortunately yes. He's ordered before because of lingering pain from a plate in his arm. But most of the time, I'm an addict who should be able to get by on aspirin. Oh well. I don't think he really understands how much pain I'm in from this Best if kept off the board bulging disc. I guess people can't if they've never felt it.
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singlesu
Member
Reged: 06/07/03
Posts: 143
Loc: kentucky
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I learned the hard way. My ex-boyfriend knew that I ordered my meds from OP's. I have been ordering for my depression for 3 years from the same pharmacy in Canada and just recently got some lortabs after detached retina surgery that left me in a lot of pain. When we broke up, he told all of his low-life friends that I had 90 lortabs, which will last me for about 6 months as I only use them for my occular migraines.
He is very anti-drug, but is an alcoholic  and has told everyone in the bar he hangs out at that I have Lortabs and now all of his creepy friends keep coming to my house wanting to know "if I want to sell" or "could you spare a couple"
I will never tell anyone, anything except my family, about my use of OP's again. I have nothing to hide, but this situation is getting pretty scary for me. I never know who is going to show up at the door and now I'm fearful of someone breaking into the house when I'm not home. 
This is scaring me to death and this is a great post 
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"I know I'm crazy cause I've got papers to prove it"
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myrrine
Member
Reged: 08/10/03
Posts: 163
Loc: Western PA
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Yes, my fiancee knows everything about my meds and conditions. So does my mother, who has been very supportive. Right now I'm the process of finding a doctor in my area (I just moved) that will sympathetic to my medical problems. I tried going to pain managment from where I lived before but they said they couldn't help me because my problem is mainly gyneological and not a back injury....I thought a chronic condition was a chronic condition...oh well.
Quincy, I'm so sorry to hear about the lack of support you have, but just remember you're better then them. Your mom is only projecting her own insecurities onto you. She probably wishes she could just "get over it" and it's obvious she can't. Besides, I bet if she didn;t have a PM doc she would have done the same thing. You'll find the right guy eventually. Just focus on yourself and your son. You and him are the only two people that matter in all of this. Don't worry about them taking your son either, the courts hate to take children away from the birth mothers, and there is nothing criminal in ordering online. If it were to come out be upfront about it, and now you have a PM doctor to document your case. So take a deep breath, you're doing a good job. Working in healthcare shows your dedicated person, and a strong person.
I wish you luck, but you really don't need it, you have your strength and my thoughts and prayers.
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They say "time marches on," I just never got used to the beat...
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Reel_X_4U
Enthusiast
Reged: 04/24/03
Posts: 255
Loc: Queens, New York City
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My girl don't know nothing, but then again I stay on the straight and narrow when she's around. Don't want to lose her over some med. Since she's so anti-drug to begin with, it's hard for me to "REELLY" find those time periods when she may not know notice me, not being the regular me.
Since we're both in tune to one another's vibes, she would catch me in a second. I hide my meds and other stuff that people wouldn't consider to be a med, but I personally feel is okay to use as medication (since I've never been a "CONFORMIST" to begin with). And then I time it, if I know she been coming over at so and so time, I take my med after she fallen asleep or a couple of hours before her arrival, so that when she does arrive I'm only partially immerse"d" with the main effect (anti-anxiety) of the med and I am able to act my way through it and conceal it from her, and I know for sure she's not going to wake, I slowly creep out of bed and take stroll around the block to help me relax (and return home and quickly take a shower, which kind of revives me and helps to eliminate any type of "medicinal" odor that may linger on me).
But then again I always on the watch of her surprising me, by just coming over (unannounced) or even if we bump into each other at work (though we work in different departments, me being in IT and her being in accounting) or something. I've developed some clever ways of avoiding detection. Cuz I've been caught before by my parents (which made for some horrible screaming matches, but at the same time taught me how to prevent detection by showing me where I messed-up), but she doesn't know about that, that's all in the past anyway.
But there have been times when I've taken my med and experiencing it's "anti-anxiety" effects fully to the max, cuz I know what things will distract her like a good movie or a nice romantic novel that she totally gets into. Anyway I suffer from GAD (Generalized Anxiety Disorder), that I've self-diagnosed and I choose the med I feel would help me get through the day, so I choose to self-medicate, by telling the doctor what I suffer from and what med I need. Currently I'm suffering from "motion sickness" brought on from the "GAD", and Meclizine doesn't help me. What helps me is Marinol 10mg (a legit med) and also helps me with my self-diagnosed condition of "GAD", otherwise the anxiety can be stifling, ripping away at your social life. No matter how stressing things become around me (like having 20 somewhat "STRESSED" end-users in my que, that I walk thorough various computer-related solutions), I tackle the stress with a smile on my face and wink in my right eye.
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Some men see things as they are and say "WHY"!!
Some men see things as they are and say "WHY"!!
I've dreamt of things that never were, and say "WHY NOT"!!
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LostShopper
Enthusiast
Reged: 05/10/02
Posts: 205
Loc: Deep South
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My husband knows completely. Though he is the type person who has never taken a drink and won't even take pain meds when prescribed, he is fully supportive of me. I would never want to think I had to hide anything from him. I thank God every day for his support. He has accompanied me to a couple doc visits when it was obvious that I needed some med help and he was appalled at the callous behavior of them when it came to prescribing. He trusts me, in that I won't throw away household money for OPs, I always make sure that the bills and necessities are taken care of, and am never "high" or irresponsible.
My mother also knows, though she has been supportive I do occassionally get the lecture about potential addiction. It is only because she does not understand, having never had any illness and having the luxury of good insurance should she need it.
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mslily
Board Addict
Reged: 09/06/02
Posts: 322
Loc: Cincinnati, OH
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My husband is the only one who knows that I have been using op's (for nearly a year now). He has been through alot of doctors appointments with me (pain management doctors, orthopaedists, physical therapists, etc.) and knows that I have been undermedicated and how much pain I am in on a day to day basis. I would never dream of keeping this a secret from him. It is my health and he has no problems with me spending money with op's to manage my pain. I am a responsible person...a wife, a mother to a 26 month old daughter and have to keep a clear head at all times. If I did NOT have pain meds available to me then I would be pretty much worthless to my family and myself. Thankfully op's exist or I wouldn't know where I'd be...probably taking leftover Celebrex that some idiotic doctor gave to me after my car accident to control my pain. Right!
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Flavia
Journeyman
Reged: 01/29/03
Posts: 65
Loc: Baja Oklahoma
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Sure, everyone in my family knows. We are getting my hubby's Zocor from an OP, he knows. My mother knew. My daughter and son-in-law know - in fact, they both trade pills with me when I am low - or if they are low. We have mutual back trouble/same medicine exactly. No big deal. We are a small, close and trusting family. Flavia
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In this day and age, you need a crutch to get through life. If you don't, you are dead, in a
coma or seriously mentally impaired.
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endpain
Stranger
Reged: 04/14/03
Posts: 6
Loc: Nation's Cap
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HONESTY IDS THE BEST POLICY...
if they love you, they will understand...just don't break trust that will ruin your marrige/dating/etc...
Always be true to you...thik about what's best for yo in your life...off the meds...see what you come up with?
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you can pick and scratch as much as you wish, but you will never be able to be rid of the itch.
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PrivateRealm
Threadhead
Reged: 03/18/03
Posts: 879
Loc: usa
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I am not married, nor am I currently dating anyone at the moment. When I do date, I do not usually tell them, as I haven't dated for the long term in a while. On that note, however, my children's father does know. My parents know, as well as my grandmother. Being single with three children, they see my pain, and all the doctor visits that I fit into my schedule. They know that I cannot afford much and that I saccrifice to be able to afford my medications that I buy from my OP. Thy support me 100%. I do not tell my friends. Many of them like Hydrocodone to "relax". One even kicked a cocaine habit by switching it for a lortab habit. (I Know, one eil for another, but I would rather her do that than cocaine, and she's been off of it for a year now). So, I do not, and won't tell my friends.
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KeriAnne~~~
"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take - but by the moments that take our breath away."
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chevygal
Veteran
Reged: 04/28/03
Posts: 504
Loc: Way down south
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THere was a thread on this a while back, It was titled "who do you tell" THere was also one on being male/female as you can't always tell from the screen name. Good threads!
Anyway, does my husband know I use op's   Nope!!!! Don't think he would care about the meds themselves, it would be the money. But.....aslong as the house is clean, dinner done, lawn mowed, my oil changed and the clothes washed and ironed and I can get out and run the tractor he is happy.(actually my kids do most of this stuff, not me) As much as I go to the doctor(which to him once a year is too much) he can't understand how come they can't just "fix" me. He is the type that unless you have literally fallen and can not get back up then ya don't need a doctor, you just bite the bullet and get on with things. In other words he tends to think I am a bit "soft" and I should toughen up. Although, I would like for HIMto wake up to what I wake to every morning as far as pain goes. As long as I have relief my house hold runs pretty smoothly and every one is happy.  So I do what I have to do to make sure I can function during the day as best I can and keep everybody happy. ANd he is happily oblivious. I do so wish I cuold share with him.
chevygal
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fiachat
Member
Reged: 11/19/02
Posts: 143
Loc: SoCal
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Yes. And he doesn't much like it but tolerates it. He also isn't one to take prescription painkillers even when they are prescribed for him, such as after his lap/chole. He's a bite on a bullet kind of guy so no worries about him getting into my meds.
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Greycie
Old Hand
Reged: 07/08/03
Posts: 461
Loc: Pacific NorthWest
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Gawd Chevy, I've had pain that *does* prohibit me from getting up and walking from time to time. I can't imagine somebody feeling as though you don't need the pain meds. I guess being able to empathize with others who also suffer from chronic pain, I can't imagine somebody thinking that our pain is so insignificant that we don't need what we get! People(!) *shaking head* lol.
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"I may not agree with what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it." - Voltaire
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chevygal
Veteran
Reged: 04/28/03
Posts: 504
Loc: Way down south
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Quote:
Gawd Chevy
Greycie, if you don;t mind I am gonna steel this phrase If ya see it my posts, I just wanted to let ya know ahead of time I'm a gonna steal it. GAWD!!! I really like that.
chevygal
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yawkaw3
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 03/22/03
Posts: 1193
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oops
Edited by yawkaw3 (08/20/03 09:23 AM)
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gage
Member
Reged: 11/27/02
Posts: 138
Loc: south central U.S.A.
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yep!!!!i dont keep nothing from her!!gage
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curious
Member
Reged: 03/14/03
Posts: 181
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I agree completely with Myyrine on this, you have documentation of the disease you are suffering from and a bonafied patient/doctor relationship to back it up. If they were to bring up the internet ordering, you just explain that that was just to keep you going until you could get in to see the PM doc. You should have no problems, and besides you can also respond that your mother suffers from the same thing and is taking narcotics as well. That's just MHO. Good luck to you. Next week things will be much better, keep your chin up!
Curious
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Greycie
Old Hand
Reged: 07/08/03
Posts: 461
Loc: Pacific NorthWest
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LOL Chevy! Supah! 
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"I may not agree with what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it." - Voltaire
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Anonymous
Unregistered
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LOL! ChevyGal! This is a great thread! I've never thought about how many people would respond to this. As for me, my wife doesn't know although I do believe honesty is the best policy. Sometimes it just isn't worth the hassle! Ya know?
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ragdoll316
Newbie
Reged: 12/27/01
Posts: 33
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Quincy,
I've had a similar run of luck lately, I gave up on men a long time ago, after my last disasterous relationship. This past May, the light of my life, my Goddaughter was diagnosed with a malignant brain tumor and is undergoing the horrors of treatment for that, although she has a really good prognosis. We have always had a very close relationship and now her mother, for some reason, has basically cut me off from seeing her, I think she feels guilty because she was kind of the "extra child" and not not the child of her now husband. I still manage to drag myself to work everyday and do a very good job and recently budget cuts have jeopardized that so I am sweating that out which of course causes a lot of stress which sure doesn't help my chronic pain, also from fybro AND hardware implants in my ankle from a triple break. I don't think there is anyway that your child can be taken from you, I pray for you, I seldom make it off the couch on the weekends because of pain and depression. I have 26 1/2 years in with the same company and could retire at 30 years, I haven't the strength to start all over and I don't even have the light of my life, my Goddaughter to brighten my life anymore. Give your little boy a hug for me, I don't think anything will come of this but a few threats and people trying to make you feel down on yourself simply because you are trying to feel well enough to give your son the love he deserves and needs. God bless you and good luck.
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guitardude
Old Hand
Reged: 09/11/02
Posts: 421
Loc: midwest
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My wife (god bless her) knows everything and understands completely. She was with me before I found online meds and saw my pain. She is happy that I have found relief, but a little worried when I overdo it....... but that's a good thing as allthough I need pain meds.... I also like em so she kind of helps keep me grounded and in control.....I was in a relationship before where I hid my usage and when she found out, it was the end of the relationship...... I think honesty is the best policy, especialy if it's something you need.... I mean, if you can't be honest then what's the point?
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"once in a while you can get shown the light, in the strangest of places if you look at it right."
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Corrie
Board Addict
Reged: 07/16/02
Posts: 362
Loc: Southeast US
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My husband knows EVERYTHING. He realizes that I have herniated disks, now a newly diagnosed chronic bladder condition and require pain meds to function properly (take care of kids, work, clean, etc.)
He's totally supportive, but also very involved in my care. He had me write down every med I take (which is only 3-4, and not all in one day) and how much, just for his reference/curiousity. He totally understands the need, and that my Primary Care Physician under-prescribes, so I need to find adequate treatment. We tell each other all.
Corrie
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chevygal
Veteran
Reged: 04/28/03
Posts: 504
Loc: Way down south
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Quote:
I mean, if you can't be honest then what's the point?
Do you mean what is the point of the relationship? I do agree with you that honesty is SO the best policy. I have been married WAY too long for there to not be a point to my relationship with my husband. Not always the greatest, I must admit. This is hard to put into words without sounding like I am a martyr or something and I am not trivializing my pain, cause it sure the hell is there. but in the grand scheme of things,(this being my family,mainly my kids) there are just certains times when best not to rock the boat.(that really is a bad choice fo words) but as long as I can do what I need to do and they are taken care of, husband included there is no point in me causeing an uproar with him that will trickle down to my kids' happiness. After being with someone for so long, I know what he can handle and what he can not, but it would also be a double edged sword for me. I have not gotton what I needed from my doc and quit going to the umteen specialist that I am suppose to go to so I come here, but if I do not get the releif I truly need husband would end up having to be too much of a help to me, which in turn our finances (such as they are) would be worse, in turn my kids would surly suffer. So........ for me at least the best thing to do is to keep certain things to myself, sure I would love to be able to share this with him, and have him understand. but he is who he is and me, I am who I am and my main objective is to raise happy young people to the best of my ability. sorry I hope this doesn't sound preachy it is not meant to, but I know there are others that are in a position like mine, and ya just gotta do what ya gotta do.And the last thing ya want to do is hurt someone.
chevygal
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Folksong
Member
Reged: 07/11/03
Posts: 128
Loc: Texas
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I am going thru a divorce but the last person I would tell would have been my ex. He is like Chevy's, uptight, never had health problems, etc. No understanding at all. Very much a hypocrite too. Used to hide things from me all time, money for instance. I am just so glad to be away from him...got my own little place now. Yay! My mom knows, she is my best friend and a totally cool person. She's 66! I haven't been using OP's very long and discovered them by accident when the doc on call prescribed 10 Lomotil instead of the usual amount and acted like a jackass about it all. I had done an internet seach on Lomotil to educate myself about it and remembered seeing that you could order it online. I was so pissed, that I went and ordered some! Then I was a little freaked out by what I'd done. So called my mom and told her. She said, "I would have done the same thing!, in a heartbeat" and called the doc a name!LOL> I think that it is a personal preference, to tell or not to tell. It's really nobody's business but our own.IMO. So I keep it to myself.
Quincy, Keep the faith baby! Don't let anyone tell you what you should or shouln't do to keep yourself pain free. Have you thought of applying for SSI? I have. That is what those programs are there for, to help where there is a legitimate need.JMO. 
Folksong-----
I wish I were more like my dog 
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