bratchild
Newbie
Reged: 09/10/03
Posts: 29
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I know this isn't the right place to post, but the site would not allow me to post it where I thought it should go.  Anyways, here it is: Sunday (Memorial Day) I went to my local pharm to pick up my husbands Gemfibrozil and Metformin. So, I pick it up, pay my twenty bucks, and go home. Yesterday afternoon, my mother in law calls me. It seems that my husband's Grandma, went to the pharmacy to get her pain medication, and when she got there, they (the pharm) told her that it had been picked up already. Here's where it gets interesting. The pharmacist said that he remembered me being in there, and that I Picked it up! Okay, I am going WTF? So, I called my husband's grandma and told her I had no idea what was going on (which I still don't) and she was just terrible to me. She is like 87 years old. So, I told her I had no idea what had happened, that I had picked up and paid for my husbands two scripts, and that I would even bring her the receipt if she wanted to see it. I mean, it really upset me! We have known each other for twenty one years! My husband said not to worry, that she is old, and that she gets confused. He said, "Remember the time I borrowed her raquetball raquets, and she accused me of cutting off the handles of her tennis raquets and didn't talk to me for six months?" There's a couple of things that bother me about this, like my mother in law said, How would I know she even had a script to pick up? I am not the sharpest knife in the drawer by any means, but how would I know that? Then she (the Grandma) accused me of signing her name for it. I called the pharm and asked to show that to me, please, and they wouldn't. No reason, do you think that is because of privacy issues? Anyway, I am not angry, but I am sure hurt. I have been crying off and on (mostly on) since yesterday afternoon. What am I to do? Any advice, anyone? Feel free to PM me as well.
PS-The one thing that makes me wonder about all this is, a girl I used to work with, she said she had a Xanax prescription, and when she went to get it at the pharm, they told her "it's already been picked up." Pharmacies are not above screwing up. If I had to name how many times this particular pharmacy has screwed up, we'd be here a long time! Thank you everyone for letting me vent. His grandmother also told me that is a criminal offense, sounmds like a threat to me, so I told her, well, okay, but I think you should have hard evidence before you threaten someone with that. I love this grandma. I thought she loved me. Help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Brat
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drewsmerdel
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 12/14/01
Posts: 1137
Loc: Nap Town
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No real answers here, family counseling???
A thought NEVER EVER,EVER mess with an elderly persons meds! They get a little old, crankey, and focus on 2 things their meds and how to keep from dying. Now, take this last comment with one gram of truth and 2 grams of, its funny cause, I can relate.
Drew
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Are you hungry?
Are you sick?
Are you begging for a break?
Are you sweet?
Are you fresh?
Are you strung up by the wrists?
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bratchild
Newbie
Reged: 09/10/03
Posts: 29
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Thanks Drew! Still, it worries me. I mean, she is threatening to have me hauled off the jail! That is not so funny. It hurts me especially since I didn;t do anything. So I should just not worry about it?
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Brat
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buey
Old Hand
Reged: 01/15/03
Posts: 453
Loc: USA
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As a person with a mother in her 80s, suffering from age related dementia, I can so relate. My guess is she is confused and picked it up herself, or told someone else to pick it up for her and forgot. Either that, or someone committed a felony. If she pursues this, the authorities will investigate. If the pharmacy released a controlled substance to the wrong person, they are going to be in serious trouble. If she threw out her old med bottle and a thief found it and knew it was around the time for a refill, he/she could have gotten lucky at the pharmacy. My guess is that she is just confused.
I've lived watching my mother go downhill in the memory dept for the last 5 years. It is not easy, believe me. She also makes up stories in her mind, some of them simply awful. She has accused my sister in law of stealing her shoes. The last big thing was the accusation that the volunteers who do the grocery shopping stole her eyeglasses. She accused my 85 year old father of having an affair with a 90 year old woman in their church, and the next door neighbor who is in her late 70s. One time she was hospitalized for something and while I was there, she leaned over and told me she had to tell me something. She whispered that my father had run off to France with his lover. My dad, is not only old, he's disabled. He has a hard time walking to the bathroom, let alone taking a lover to France. When I told her that wasn't true, I was just there visiting him before seeing her, she yelled at me, telling me she knows it true and I must be confused if I thought I had seen him that day. The absolute worse thing she has said was to call me into another room to tell me not to leave my then 6 year old son alone with grandpa, because he tried to molest my brother's daughter. Said that they were babysitting them last week and my dad followed my niece up to the bathroom and started touching her. She claims she started screaming for him to stop it, and he came downstairs. Well I told her that she was very confused and to be careful what she accuses people of. Also, reminded her that my niece is 17 years old, and they have not babysat for them in ten years. I told my brother who was devastated for my father that she was spreading this to all family members and friends. Said he hasn't left his kids there in 10 years, and dad can't walk up the stairs and has not been able to in 5 years.
It's so sad but it does not get better once it starts, believe me. Every week now, there is a new story. We never know if what she says is real or a delusion. My bet is that your grandma may have some memory problems. Hope it only stays contained to memory and not to making things up in her mind. You have to put this behind you. Forgive her and get on with life. Because nothing is going to change her mind about this. Someday she will forget about it anyway. And like I said, if she pursues it, the police will get involved and you will be cleared. Sorry you are going through this, but I know what you are going through.
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jmnss
Stranger
Reged: 04/27/04
Posts: 19
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Take a deep breath, Brat, and try to relax. Even if she calls the police, they can't arrest anyone without hard facts. If she does call, that might not be such a bad thing. At least the pharmacy would have to provide some solid info.
Secondly, you might consider rounding up gramma, your hubby and going there to speak to the store MANAGER. Explain the situation in a calm and lucid manner (well, as much as possible) and ask for an accounting. If he's not forthcoming you should consider changing pharmacies right quick.
Lastly, from experience, if she's starting to make accusations, coming up with odd stories, you're going to have to grow a thicker skin. Easy to say, right? But true. It's difficult, I've been there. My mom actually followed me out to my car once, screaming for all the world to hear, that I had stolen my father's WWII medals and put them in my girdle. Well.....of course I had not. (Nor have I ever worn a girdle). That was over seven years ago and she still comes up with that story from time to time. Now I just smile and try to guide the conversation to other things. My mantra being "patience is a virtue".
Hang in there!
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Guzele
Journeyman
Reged: 06/04/02
Posts: 71
Loc: Virginia
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Right! My Mother is only finally talking to me again via email only after about 4 months. Her explanation? I hadn't been following "the plan", which was never explained to me. Put on some armor, keep the good memories precious.
G
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"I was cured, all right.........."-Alex DeLarge, A Clockwork Orange
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sassyg
Member
Reged: 08/12/02
Posts: 171
Loc: Coloraddy
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The thing is, not only are pharmacies not above screwing up, they're not above EMPLOYING DRUG ADDICTS WHO STEAL PRESCRIPTIONS!!!!! I found it INCREDIBLE that, when I had Kaiser, and picked up my Adderall prescription (two-month supply) it only had about 20 pills in the bottle!!! They said the pharm tech "screwed up the count", but this stuff is so controlled, how else would the pharm tech get his hands on some, than to short a customer????? If this pharmacy doesn't level with you I think you should report them/call the police.
Good luck and don't go taking this personally 'cause you didn't do anything wrong!!
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Sassy!
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want2bcalm
Member
Reged: 04/03/04
Posts: 144
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I am so very, very, very sorry for you people. I can relate. I have an 86 yo mom. She is just starting to get a little out of it. Please don't take this wrong. I know it is NOT funny when it is happening to you but these stories made my day. NOT the one about the med accusations but the medals in the girdle and the dad running off to France w/his lover. It is terribly sad and I don't want to offend anyone. Personally I would rather my mom made outlandish accusations. Instead she just gets real angry about dumb stuff and is terribly uptight about the littlest things. My little boy didn't want to sleep downstairs at her house & she had a hissy fit about it. I calmly made a bed for him beside mine. She still acted all offended by the fact that a 10 yo didn't want to sleep in a strange house (he hasn't been there since he was 4!) by himself.
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drewsmerdel
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 12/14/01
Posts: 1137
Loc: Nap Town
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Brat,
Like you said you didint do anything, grandma might take a while to heal(mentally) over this, but why waste your energy on a bogus accusation??
Ya know with the new HIPPA laws, the pharm might be in legal vilolation of the new law. Depending on you siuation you might consider consulting a layer that knows the new HIPPA regs. I do know that under the new law speaking of others conditions, meds, etc is a BIG NO, NO, That dosnt matter if it is your doc, therapist, or pharmasist.
Drew
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Are you hungry?
Are you sick?
Are you begging for a break?
Are you sweet?
Are you fresh?
Are you strung up by the wrists?
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midnight
Enthusiast
Reged: 12/09/01
Posts: 292
Loc: u s
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BRAT, I had a large chain drugstore give me the wrong prescription twice!!! it had my name on but when i opened it up i knew it wasnt the medication i had been taking, so i returned it. so after that happened TWICE, i was upset thinking what if they gave someone else my pain meds... do you think they would return it? .. i doubt the pharmacy would believe me, they would say i allready picked it up. so i no longer go to that large chain drugstore.
I learned first hand that they do make big mistakes.Pharmacists are soo busy they cant remember everything that goes on and DO make mistakes.
Midnight
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prettyday
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 02/09/03
Posts: 1484
Loc: Coastal Sage Scrub
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This is a nasty situation. This is why it is so wrong for the AMA and DEA to clamp down on drs and prescribing because the people that don't care will just find other ways to hurt the people that do....
I just got this vibe....Have you ever had pain meds filled there for you or your husband locally? This grandmother, she shares the same last name with you and your spouse, right? Cause I am smelling a con at the pharmacy...with all the children doing elder care these days, and picking up their own kids, and dealing with extended work hours, it would not take a bad person long when handing out rxs to see the possiblilities in confusion; specially if they recognize when a pt gets Altziemer (sp?) meds and pain meds at once. That is a plum just begging to be purloined.
Hard to stomach. But some people don't care what they do to you or your marriage. You are just a tool to a end to them.
Scream cameras, and legal counsel.
Oh, still can't talk about parent's confusion before death. just know you have my love and sympathy and a useless kind of rage.
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I believe there are more urgent and honorable occupations than the incomparable waste of time we call suffering.
Sidonie Gabrielle Colette
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bratchild
Newbie
Reged: 09/10/03
Posts: 29
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Thanks to prettyday, midnight, drewsmerdel, want2bcalm, sassyg, guzele, jmnss and buey for your thoughts and posts! It means a lot to me that you guys care. I am doing okay-I have not heard anything else about this. My husband keeps teasing me, telling me the police patrol cars are gonna roll up here any minute and arrest me. He is trying to be supportive in his own way since he knows how Grandma can be! Well, if anything further develops, I will let you all know. Thank you to all of you-I appreciate it very much!
Rhonda
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Brat
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hoop123
Enthusiast
Reged: 12/14/01
Posts: 258
Loc: New York
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Brat,
I am sorry for youre dillema. The day you picked up youre meds you signed for them , right?. The state I live in makes you sign for every script you pick up at that time.So the Pharm should have a record of the RX's that you signed for. Also they give you receipts for each med. So please for my sake do not take this to heart.
If all of the things I mentioned above are true , I would do one of two things to relieve youre stress.
1) If youre Grandma has a legal guardian , maybe she could go to the pharm and ask for the records of meds received in the past two months. They can usually print that out in seconds.
2) File a police report if it is a controlled substance. I have a wife , 3 children all with cronic conditions. Many mistakes have been made over the years. In fact we just changed pharms because I was accused of picking up my meds when in fact they were given to an elderly gentleman who thankfully returned them the next afternoon. Up until that point the owner was blaming me , yet his high school help had pulled the bag containing the meds, while I was talking with the pharmacist over at the other end of the counter. It was a controlled med and the owner threatened calling the police that morning. I asked him to wait and sure enouugh the bag showed up. No apology from the owner , now he lost our business. Which was quite good. But my point is if this has gone one for a couple of weeks, and no resolution. Call the police. Somebody took the meds. I've seen and heard quite a few stories that go on at pharms.
If this store has a delivery service, it is possible that a delivery person picked the bag up and took it. A lot of pharms put the bags in plain view behind the counter. Now I have lousy vision, but the pharm I used before , you could easily read the name of the person and the drug right from the counter. So someone could request it that way. Especially if they don't know Grandma face to face. So if I was you , it sounds like it's eating at you and could cause a family rift. You don't want that. Settle it once and for all.
Sorry for the long post. I feel youre pain having been accused myself of stealing meds only to find out they were given to the wrong person. Best of luck.
Best Regards,
Hoop
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DAdrian
Member
Reged: 11/05/03
Posts: 146
Loc: Left Coast
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That is so strange. When I pick up any prescription, there is a sticker that I have to sign, and they keep them in sequential date order in a notebook or on a clipboard. All they would have to do is to check the date and find the sticker and see who signed for it. Sounds to me more like maybe the pharmacy screwed up and let the wrong person sign for it and they are trying to CYA.
REFUSE TO BE UPSET. You did nothing wrong. The more heated you get in your denials, the worse it will look. Stay calm and say, "I picked up my husband's medication." Nothing more and nothing less. If in the unlikely event she wanted to do something about it, they would have to produce your signature on the receipt as proof.
Someone here is confused or has something to hide, but it's not you.
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DAdrian :-)
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barney07
Stranger
Reged: 02/14/04
Posts: 11
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Bratchild,
You need to file a police report. It sounds as like you have done nothing wrong. With the help of the police you will be able to clear this up!
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omega55
Enthusiast
Reged: 12/03/02
Posts: 272
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I have to agree with Hoop and DAdrian. I think, by law, the pharmacy MUST have a persons signature for any prescription that is picked up. Check with the pharmacy as they should have a record as to who picked up that particular prescription. It's a simple solution, I think, to your heart-felt problem. If YOU signed for it, however, I think you may have a problem. Let's hope not 
Good luck..
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fishinpanic
Newbie
Reged: 05/23/04
Posts: 29
Loc: Colorado
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At Walgreen's, I never have to sign for any RX's, which have included hydro, xanax and klonopin. So I'm not sure it's a law, probably depends by state and pharmacy.
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sassyg
Member
Reged: 08/12/02
Posts: 171
Loc: Coloraddy
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Hey Bratster! Let us know what develops, ok?? Lots o' people concerned for you, obviously!
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Sassy!
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night_shade
Threadhead
Reged: 08/26/03
Posts: 907
Loc: The State of Hockey
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Same here...Walgreens doesn't even make you sign for credit card purchases anymore! They NEVER make me sign for Adderall, Methadone or Oxy IR or anything else...so it isn't just in Colorado--it's Minnesota, too.
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Never underestimate the predictability of stupidity.
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bratchild
Newbie
Reged: 09/10/03
Posts: 29
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hey Guys!
I have not heard one word about anything, not a word at all. Let's hope it stays that way! Knowing my luck of course, it probably will not! I mean, I know I didn't do anything, I just dont want there to be estrangement between family members and myself. Thanks to all of you again for your support, thoughts and kind words.
Brat
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Brat
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IMSUSCOT1
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 10/23/02
Posts: 1122
Loc: usa
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I empathize....I deal with my mother in law, who is 78 and she still has all her marbles, but after a knee surgery & hip replacment she lived with us for 8 months & constantly lost things & accused my husband of throwing them away! Tell grandma you love her more than life itself & want to get this straightened out...that you want to go with HER to the pharmacy...the pharmacy can then, with her present, show her who signed for the script (if it's bought on insurance, SOMEONE had to sign for it). I'd give you ten to one grandma picked it up & didn't remember, nor can she find it....it may be time for grandma to have some assistance...my mother in law CANNOT keep her meds straight and I've had to intervene when she's called in refills of meds she doesn't & shouldn't take anymore to avoid serious reactions.....if you approach her in a loving way & are sincere in wanting to get to the bottom of it...I'd be willing to bet she'll go with you to the pharmacy to straighten it out....good luck & be patient, you will be 80 too someday.
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IMSUSCOT1
Pooh-Bah
Reged: 10/23/02
Posts: 1122
Loc: usa
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Sorry Drew, but under HIPAA you must file a complaint with the Scy of Health & Human Services, not contact a lawyer.....legal action is taken by the government, NOT the offendee....you file a complaint and it goes up the line from there...and anyway the pharmacy did right by telling the grandaughter they couldn't show her the slip that was signed....that would have been a HIPAA violation....the pharmacy hasn't discussed grandma's condition...only that the grandaughter picked it up....if grandma & grandaughter go in TOGETHER, they can see WHO signed for this & put it to bed....not EVERYTHING has to be letigious...this is NOT lawsuit worthy nor appropriate...HIPAA will allow the appropriate government authority to investigate the complaint & penalize the offending provider end of story....you get nada...the government can get up to $25,000 per offense, provided it's serious enough to warrant such a fine...trust me, this doesn't qualify
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bratchild
Newbie
Reged: 09/10/03
Posts: 29
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Thanks guys, to all of you once again! I felt a lot better reading all of your posts! I still have not heard one single thing yet! my husband said dont worry about it, he said just don't bother Grandma much, and when we do go see her, she will probably have forgotten all about it. He said she will say something one day, and forget it the next. I haven't been to see her since this whole mess started. I figured I would just upset her more, and, as much as I feel like a yellow belly chicken admitting it, I really didnt want to get yelled at anymore!So, I will just bide my time, and mind my own business. Thanks again guys for everything!
Brat
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Brat
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