lemongrass
Board Addict
Reged: 09/23/03
Posts: 361
Loc: IL
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I hope this isn't long and drawn out for you folks. I'll try to keep it simplified.
I have several medical conditions and I'm uninsured. My bofriend of nearly 15 years wants to get married. For practical reasons, it would benefit me very much for insurance purposes. On the other hand, should I become completely disabled, would I be able to get SSI or SSD if I'm married?
No, it's not that "I" want my cake and eat it too. I just don't want to be burdensome to my family and have my husband paying out hand over fist for everything. It's difficult as it is for us, but if I end up in a debilitating state, at least SSI or SSD would help ease some of the financial burden.
I just don't know which way would best benefit us. Right now, getting married is a necessity so that I can see doctors and get the medical treatment I need.
Any help is greatly appreciated.
lemongrass
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IMSUSCOT1
Threadhead
Reged: 10/23/02
Posts: 869
Loc: usa
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Your ability to collect SSI disability is based on your prior income & your inability to work....the amount you'd be eligible to collect is based on prior income....the only way your husbands income would come into play would be if you apply for state funded medical assistance, which takes into consideration total household income....
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scissorhands
Member

Reged: 06/04/03
Posts: 167
Loc: Hell
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A friend of mine had a brain tumor removed, one lung removed(cancer), had two back surgergies and neck surgery, was denied her social security disability alhough her medical qualified her disabled, because her husband made to much money...I do understand about needing the medical treatment now. My question I guess is " Do you love him? "
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Baseball is wrong...Man with four balls cannot walk!
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lemongrass
Board Addict
Reged: 09/23/03
Posts: 361
Loc: IL
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Now that was two conflicting results. Hehe.
Yes, I do love him. Could do without some of his goofy antics, but I do love him.
Love that avitar, scissorhands!
lemongrass
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lemongrass
Board Addict
Reged: 09/23/03
Posts: 361
Loc: IL
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I suppose if it came down to it, as desperate times call for desperate measures, we could always get divorced. Pay no attention to my wry sense of humor. I'm in pain, dang it! LOL
lemongrass
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scissorhands
Member

Reged: 06/04/03
Posts: 167
Loc: Hell
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Thanks Lemongrass: I know there is a SSD website that might go into greater detail but this happened to my friend just a few months ago is why it was still fresh in my brain. Since you answered my Love question, hope to see an upcoming announcement soon. My husband and I have been married 29 years and the "antics" do get easier to live with everyday because the love is there...
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Baseball is wrong...Man with four balls cannot walk!
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lemongrass
Board Addict
Reged: 09/23/03
Posts: 361
Loc: IL
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Scissorhands, I just noticed your signature. Oh man, did I have a good laugh!
Anyway, this is what I don't get about Social Security, Medicare/Medicaid and things of this nature. I mean, what's a family to do when a loved one is ill?
I'm so sorry about your friend's condition. Sounds like it's been a hard battle. I do wish them the best and will pray they have many good days to look forward to.
Thanks for your help.
lemongrass
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scissorhands
Member

Reged: 06/04/03
Posts: 167
Loc: Hell
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Lemongrass: The sad part is when both are working and contributing to the household bills and then one can no longer work, the bills are still there...Although her husband makes "good money', their lifestyle of living was use to two incomes. It's not right when anyone deserves disability and its not there for them when they need it. I wish the best for you and I would fight it all the way...
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Baseball is wrong...Man with four balls cannot walk!
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chevygal
Veteran
Reged: 04/28/03
Posts: 504
Loc: Way down south
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"I suppose if it came down to it, as desperate times call for desperate measures, we could always get divorced. Pay no attention to my wry sense of humor. I'm in pain, dang it! LOL"
Ya know lemongrass, I didn't laugh at your statement. If it came down to haveing to divorce so you can survive, you bet your boots I would do it. You divorce and go back to living together as you are now, but you will get what you have coming. Good luck to ya, and I,also, will be looking for this announcement 
chevygal
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lemongrass
Board Addict
Reged: 09/23/03
Posts: 361
Loc: IL
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Hi, Chevygal. I guess I really didn't expect anyone else to laugh. That's why I said to ignore my wry sense of humor. To me, however, I have to laugh or I will cry. And right now I'm crying. I'm in such excruciating pain and just took my last hydro, which isn't even going to put a dent in this pain of mine. And off to work I must go in just a short, couple of hours. But thank you so much for your compassionate reply. I do appreciate it.
Actually, ladies, the wedding date is for this month...October 30th. Just wheel me down the aisle, seeing as I can't walk.
Scissorhands, I noticed you're from TN. I have a friend in town who is from Atwood and she's paying me a visit later today. She was in Milan for quite a few years. We visited her this summer, in Atwood, and it's beautiful there! If it weren't for hubby-to-be's job, I'd move there in a heartbeat.
Alright, time to make the coffee and get a grip on today.
Thanks again.
lemongrass
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scissorhands
Member

Reged: 06/04/03
Posts: 167
Loc: Hell
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Congratulations on the wedding date Lemongrass, I love TN, we live on a forty-acre farm far away from everyone...It's a small town where everyone knows everybody. Was born in Ohio but have lived in Tn for most of my life. I got married when I was sixteen and have lived in the same place ever since, I actually have told my husband and sons that I want to be buried here on the farm...At first they laughed but now are starting to take me serious. Sorry you are in so much pain and having to work (especially without meds.)
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Baseball is wrong...Man with four balls cannot walk!
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Folksong
Member
Reged: 07/11/03
Posts: 128
Loc: Texas
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Lemongrass,
My lawyer told me that you could apply for SSI anytime when you became unable to work. Married or unmarried...
folksong
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IMSUSCOT1
Threadhead
Reged: 10/23/02
Posts: 869
Loc: usa
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I have no doubt your friend SSI disability claim was denied...up to 60% are on the first attempt....but...it's not based on family income.....it's based soley on the disableds earnings & contributions to SSI....
4. I am disabled, but I have plenty of money in the bank. Do I have to wait until this money is gone before I apply for Social Security disability benefits?
No. If you have worked in recent years or if you are applying for Disabled Widow's or Widower's benefits or Disabled Adult Child benefits, it does not matter how much money you have in the bank. There is no reason to wait to file the claim.
This and more info can be found at
http://www.nosscr.org/faqind.html
My husband makes a very good living as management for the US postal svc...and I was in the process of applying for SSI....his income did not enter into to it...there are many other reasons a claim for SSI disabiliyt payments is refused at the first level...I urge you to get more information for SSI
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junebug101
Journeyman
Reged: 03/27/03
Posts: 69
Loc: NY
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Yea I love a wedding! In the words of my mother in law, you'll be such a gawgeous broyde! Guess what part of Long Island that family's from!
All kidding aside, looking out for number one is very important these days. I'm sure you'll be very happy, but the insurance will be a pain relief in itself. Good luck to both of you!
PS, I'm assuming you're a girl? Otherwise you'd be a dahling groom. 
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Kid Free and Loving It!
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lemongrass
Board Addict
Reged: 09/23/03
Posts: 361
Loc: IL
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Wow! Thank you all so much for your replies!
Scissorhands, you belong where your heart is. Home doesn't have to be where you were originally born, that's for sure. If I loved my home that much, I'd want to have a nice spot reserved on that land for my little ol' self as well. And look at that, married at 16 and still with your hubby! How awesome is that! You're one of the rare few.
Folksong, thanks for your info. Helpful, indeed! You're a gem.
IMSUSCOT, how informative! And thank you so much for that link. That's going to be a huge help.
And, Junebug, love that NY accent! Ha, ha! Yes, I'm a female. Hehe.
You've all been wonderful. A humble thank you to each one of you.
lemongrass
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night_shade
Threadhead
Reged: 08/26/03
Posts: 907
Loc: The State of Hockey
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Lemongrass-
I recently went through a divorce and belong to a message board moderated by a local attorney who addresses simple questions for free. Somebody posted something along the lines you are wondering about. I have included the text below:
Minnesota here.
Here is the circumstance we are in.
I am married to a man for almost 2 years in November. He has adopted my two sons who are ages 12 and 13.
My husband is a sweet man but financially we should never have goten married.
I was a widow with 2 small children and receiving social security because I am a parent of almost 400 extra a month. Of course when I got married the benefits to me stopped however I still do get ss for the boys. I put away a few hundred a month for them for college.
I have had several health problems since I got married to second husband and we are having to pay alot out of pocket medical bills. Before I married both my boys and I were on medical assistance.
My husband now has 4 children from a prior marriage which he pays 1000 a month support for.
My uestion is this....social security has told me that if I divorce my husband that I am married to now that I can go back and receive the benefits under my dead husbands ss.
Medical worker has told me that if I get divorced I will get on medical assistance. Also if I get divorced then my 2 boys will get free school lunches. Right now the schools go by husbands gross income and they dont care that 39% of his net pay goes to support.
I want to know...do people get divorced for financial reasons and then still live together?
Can we get divorced without a lawyers help? We own our home and husband told me that I can have the home but the loan is in both of our names....I have bad credit...will the bank put the home just in my name with bad credit ?
All of this would be for financial.
I do not think husband should have to pay child support for our boys either because I receive 1500 for them monthly for survivors benefits.
Have you ever heard of this? Are we jsut totally nuts to even think of such a thing. We are lsoing money by being married!
Any help you can give is really appreciated.
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I have had prior cases where parties have divorced for financial reasons and then cohabitated together. I cannot answer your question regarding the Social Security benefits without researching that particular matter.
If you have simple issues and no conflicts, you may be able to divorce by agreement and fill out forms without a lawyers help. If you go to http://www.nvo.com/beaulier/do1it1yourself" you can find forms by Docupro. They guarantee that their forms are self explanatory and will work in each state.
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Hope this gives you some idea what others are doing in your situation.
Best of luck! Social Security is a real pain in the butt and barely pays for groceries!
night_shade
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Never underestimate the predictability of stupidity.
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ellis71
Newbie
Reged: 09/16/03
Posts: 33
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Lemongrass,
I have read all the posts here and I don't want to confuse matters although I have vast experience in this matter. SSI is basically a type of welfare for the disabled and your husband's income plays a vital role in the amount of SSI you will receive. If there are no children the reduction starts when he earns over $639 a month and the SSI is reduced by $1.00 for every $2.00 he earns over that amount, there is nothing payable if he earns over $1727.
If you are eligible for Social Security Disability (different from SSI), his income does not effect those benefits. To be eligible for SSD benefits you must have worked 5 out of the last 10 years prior to your disability date. Please visit your local SSA office before you get married to have a better understanding of how this will effect you. Just my 2 cents.
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lemongrass
Board Addict
Reged: 09/23/03
Posts: 361
Loc: IL
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Ah, thank you both! You're all such charming, helpful people! This makes much more sense to me now.
Well, I'm working now and I don't anticipate being in dire need anytime soon. I just wanted to know what I can expect going into this marriage. And boy, the abundance of information is good to have prior knowledge of. One needs to know how to arm themself in extreme situations.
Thank you again, from the bottom of my humble heart! 
lemongrass
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