DrugBuyers.Com: Need To Stop Smoking....

I haven't posted on this subject in a few days, because I wanted to actually think about what you said. You are absolutely right about the "want and need"!!! So, I will break it down... I NEED to quit all together, but really don't want to. What I WANT to do is cut way back. I know this is crazy... I know smoking can kill, I am not oblivious to the fact. But to be totaly honest... I like having a cigarette every now and then. But it has gotten way out of control. I smoke on average 2 1/2 packs a day (probably closer to 3). I know you're thinking - "she's an idiot" and you are absolutely right!!! That is why I really, really want to cut back. So, here is what I have done since I last posted. I made a descion to stop buying by the carton. I have only bought one pack each time I have gone to the store. If I have an excessive amount - I will smoke an excessive amount - right? I made my descion known to my husband and kids, to have someone to be accountable to! I explained to them that they would have to tell me when I was smoking one right after the other. It is such a habit that sometimes I will light one and already have one lit. I also explained to them that I might, on occasion, get angry with them for calling me on it; but to please do it anyway. I told them not to take it personally, that I loved them all dearly and needed their help; and that in the long run they would be helping me and themselves. So, as not to place all the responsibility on them, which is not fair, I decided to only smoke a cig every 30 minutes. My Choice! Listen guys, to smoke 3 packs a day - you are lighing up constantly - almost chain smoking. My worst enemy is sitting at the pc - so now I leave them in another room - that deters me a great deal - cause I don't want to keep getting up!!! LOL I started all of this on Thursday. Today is Saturday... so far so good. Yes I have cheated, can't lie to you. But since Thursday I have smoked a total of 4 packs. That averages out to a little less than 2 packs a day. I think that is a small success. I WILL continue to cut down. I know this all sounds so crazy -- I should just STOP, but I don't know if I can. I am not the Cold Turkey type and as i said earlier - I just want to cut down. My goal is 1/2 pack a day. My husband also smokes and he has always only smoked about 6 or 7 a day. To me that would be wonderful, based on what I am doing now. So, thanks for all of your help and advice. Any comments would be appreciated. Even if you think I am totally wrong or messed up, sometimes I need to hear that, too. But would appreciate encouragement along with the criticism.

Just as an after thought: I live in the capital of tobacco country - packs cost between $2.00 to $4.00, I smoke the cheaper. So, 3 packs a day averages out to $42.00 a week. that is too much to spend on something that can kill you!!! And I know people in other parts of the country pay way more.
So, thanks for "listening" to my rambling!!!

--------------------
TTFN' Kim
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Once I Stopped to think... Sad part is I never started back!!!