DrugBuyers.Com: Where to turn??

Mercy me - can I ever relate to everything that everyone has posted!

My dear Corrie, I have been exactly where you are now. Somehow, I survived, but it pains me to no end that my children's memories of me are ones of me being sick and taking pills. They are grown now and have children of their own, so they understand a little better what was happening to me while they were growing up. (Migraines mostly, but some of them lasted 30 days, and I was constantly sick in bed, throwing up. What they remember most is having to "be quiet - Mommy has another headache.")

Sky Queen - I'm afraid I'm going to be facing your situation very soon. My husband and I have been married 25 years, and like everyone, we've had our ups and downs. He's made the comment several times in the last few months about how much better things seem to be getting between us,... because... I'm so much calmer, easy-going, so much more loving, and willing to get out and do more with him. He has no idea that it's because I've finally gotten sufficient (for the most part) pain relief!!!! I'm terrified, because now it's time to do the taxes and he's going to see the credit card bills where I've been ordering from OPs. I've tried six ways to Sunday to find a way to tell him, but I just can't. (When we first got married, I was on diet pills and the term "drug addict" has been thrown at me, too.)

Yawkaw - for someone so young (relative to my 53 years, anyway) you have an incredible insight to things and you seem wise beyond your years. I always find your posts to be helpful, definitely well-informed, and friendly. Thank you for all the time you take to contribute to this board. I know how hard it is when you're in school - been there, done that. You hit the nail on the head about relationships, and the "flat effect" that comes from time spent on opiates. Unless you've been through it yourself, it's really hard to comprehend. And to you and Zeuzjuz, in all honesty, if my 33 year-old daughter was involved with someone who was "on narcotics" - well, shame on me/us, but the first thing we'd (her Daddy & I) would do is try to steer her away from someone "involved with drugs." THAT IS - that's what we would have done before I was injured and began living my life in pain, and on narcotics, too! (Amazing how one bad fall can create in you such empathy for others you once thought to be "weak" or who should just "suck it up" and "be strong.")

I'm so thankful to all who have posted on this thread. I've been trying to find a way to express some of these feelings for so long, and y'all did it for me. And very well, too!

And Corrie, you've already made a great start. You have goals, and you're doing what you need to do to achieve them. You have made the decision to "opt in" to life, instead of laying on the sofa, moaning, and letting life pass you by. As Yawkaw said, it's amazing what people who live with daily, chronic pain accomplish in their lives. You just keep putting one foot in front of the other, and the next thing you know - there you are! Ask for help from whomever you can, whenever you need it. And always remember that we're here for you, too.

Thanks to all of you, and Happy New Year to everyone!

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"Ignorance in action is terrifying to behold!"