Twinkle_Toes
Journeyman
Reged: 03/30/03
Posts: 52
Loc: NY area
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Hi All,
I've been taking quite a few different pain meds for quite some time now. I've made myself take a few days off over the last 2 years but basically have taken meds everyday.
My daily doses are pretty much as follows. 2 times a day (usually in the afternoon and again in the evening) I take: 1 Norco 10/325, 3 Perduretas, a 10mg Valium or a half of xanax. Sometimes between the doses I take a Soma or 2. I admit I love the buzz as well as the pain relief. My life is fine, work is good, and I generally feel good-as long as I take my doses. I feel like absolute Best if kept off the board if I try to take a few days off though. So I generally don't. (And when I have I've taken buprenephren to chill me out.)
Am I insane and headed for big trouble?
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infliksta
Journeyman
Reged: 10/29/03
Posts: 84
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no it takes me 3 or 4 norco's to kill pain i can't even notice if i take a couple perduertas. i try to take a break and usually don't succeed. if you are kept in pain long enough you'll do anything to get out. i feel like i'm traped under ground and the people that are supposed to get me out are using a toothpick to get me out instead of a backho or something. i like to call those people doctors and their tookpick tyleno or aleve.
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we're out of our medicine, out of our minds and we're wanting yours let us in.
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Stardog
Member
Reged: 08/28/04
Posts: 195
Loc: Where it all Begins
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To an average Joe, you're a dead man walking. For board members, you're on the light side. Well, you're definitely physically dependent, but at this point, even with the benzos, tapering or withdrawing entirely (you'd have to taper with the benzos) would not mean more than some unpleasantness for a week, and you can continue to use the buprenorphine during withdrawal to make it easier on you. You're not in any danger of health problems, unless you're boozing it up, too.
So much for what you take now... Have you been escalating your dose? The body notoriously finds it easy to defend against benzos and Soma, and I'd bet that at your current dose they don't have the effects they used to. Those would likely pose more problems than the Norco if you bump their dose up. Within less than a month, that little monkey on your back can become a superchimp.
I dunno, are you worried about having a problem? You're not a real drug addict unless it has an effect on your family and career (as stated in the DSM-IV). If you honestly feel it doesn't affect your quality of life, and your dosage stays the same, then you've just got some nagging physical dependence that you can choose to deal with at a convenient time.
But mental dependence is not so objective or easily defined. It's never the same once you're off for good. That's true for smoking, drinking, and prescription medication alike. If you LIKE doing it, and suddenly you find you can't do it anymore, you could feel that life is a lot uglier. For instance, instead of taking the pills, you'd have to find something else that thrills you, like games, sex, kayaking, etc. You would expect a comparable amount of fun during the day, and you might get testy if you find it's difficult to get such a dependable thrill. If you feel like you might be developing a problem, cut down a bit and see if you get more testy with people and have less goal-seeking behavior.
That all said, I hope you don't get banned. Recreational use is an automatic boot in the butt. You may want to clarify that the buzz is nice, but that you need the meds for legitimate reasons.
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JBRONCFAN
Member
Reged: 04/20/04
Posts: 124
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Only you know your pain. What would be worse, detoxing off the meds or the pain the meds protect you from? It's a lesser of two evil kinda thing. If you're starting to wig out a little bit, try to go as long as you can without the meds but always have the meds around, just in case.
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Twinkle_Toes
Journeyman
Reged: 03/30/03
Posts: 52
Loc: NY area
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I always appreciate this board and the members honesty.
First, I'm not a recreational user. Though, I have found the euphoria associated with my pain meds to be an added bonus. I have chronic lower back pain. Was stabbed twice in the lower back years ago and sustained permanent nerve damage as a result. I frequent a chiropractor, work out, stretch and am otherwise in pretty good shape. I just wake up every single day of my life with an all consuming back pain.
I have definitely over the last couple years built up my dosage. I'm very conscious of this. When I started I was taking HALF a 10/500 and a 15mg codeine tab and feeling awesome! Early on I decided to bundle the pain meds in hopes of not taking too much of one thing (specifically Hydro) and think somtimes that everything is ok. Like I said, I'm not a crazed pillhead running wild... yet. Everything in my life seems to be in order. Although I have to admit, I have been hiding this use from everyone I know, including my spouse. Years and years ago I was a party animal (booze and some coke) and quit have it all. Been "sober" 12 years. I have no interest at all in drinking, it's a bummer, and especially with all these pain meds (which I feel are far supierior for pain and mood anyway).
Lately I have woke up in pain and felt sort of, well, just uncomfortable with the fact that I really do NEED these pills to feel good. I guess that's what I'm starting to think about. You know, it's like, so now what? I'm gonna do this for the rest of my life? Of course the answer is no, and then you just start saying to yourself, "well today is as good as any to quit taking all this Best if kept off the board." Cause my use will inevitably increase. That's just the nature of this scenario.
I guess I'm just babbling and answering my own questions. But I truly treasure this board. Although my posts are few, I've been reading and gaining so much from the people here for a long time. It's comforting to hear other pain sufferers assure me all is not lost!
Thanks everybody.
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johng
Board Addict
Reged: 02/13/03
Posts: 351
Loc: great lakes
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there is nothing wrong being dependant on meds. if you are taking them to improve your quilaty of life. for almost three years i needed pain meds every day. but through grace i am down to 20 tabs a month. i felt like i was apill popper for needing the meds. but it allowed me to work play with my two kids and do things with my wife with out limping. physical dependance is normal for long term care. PMD's know this. if you are not takeing esclatating doses or takeing them to avoid emotional things then be happy that what you are taking helps
johng
ps
PM if you like I always answer them
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Ask and it will be given to you Matthew 7:7
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teetertot
Journeyman
Reged: 12/13/03
Posts: 55
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Hey, I like your name "twinkle toes"... Yes I have to say, some days I get the same thoughts in my head, and think , well, today is the day to begin to cut back, but then the anxiety builds up, and something happens to where you are still where you were the day before. I have talked to a previous M.D. about this, and I just bluntly asked him "Am I going to have to be on this medication the rest of my life?" and he gave me the response "With your condition.... yes I am afraid the only other alternative to the pain medication is to either take the medication, or live with the pain" and he told me that there is nothing wrong with taking the medication as long as it is taken for the right reason's and that is the only way i can perform my daily activities or live a "normal" life.... but I understand what you are saying about this because I have days where I feel the same way like that I don t have control over my own life with out my medication, but it is perfectly normal to feel that way and for you to take your medication as long as it is taken for the right reasons, and yes over the years our body builds up a tolerance to the meds to where 1 was helping before and now it takes 2-3 of the same medication to achieve the same "relief" (plus the fact that we aren't getting any younger, could affect that too, ooops, did i just say that  .... Good Luck! Teeter
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PAIDFO
Member
Reged: 02/01/03
Posts: 148
Loc: southeast
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I had a chat with my PM Dr about this subject.I asked if I was gonna have to take meds the rest of my life and he told me yup,unless a miracle came my way.He said the 2 surgeries were probably gonna turn into more surgeries down the road to remove scar tissue and the pain will only get worse as I age.Then he explained the situation to me like this.He asked if I was diagnosed with blood pressure problems would I take the meds.Of course I would if needed.He assured me if I want to live a productive life with minimal pain I would have to take meds for the rest of my life.I was floored.I accepted it. (finally)I don't hide it but I don't wave the meds around for the world to know.I run a very high volume food establishment to the tune of 65hrs a week minmum,still manage to spend time with my wife and kid, ride my Harley,mow grass and all the things I loved before the botched surgeries.The stigma of taking meds is hard to overcome but it was possible for me.Sorry if this post is to long but I just wanted to share my 2 cents,Happy Labor Day to all......P
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"The difference between Ordinary and Extraordinary is the Little Extra"
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ikestormu11
Member
Reged: 06/02/04
Posts: 112
Loc: District of Columbia area
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That sucks PAIDFO, I feel for you man. The good news is you have a steady job and a Harley! Sweet! It sounds like your making your lemons into lemonade. Keep your head and your Harley up! Good luck.
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nycalt
Reged: 05/04/04
Posts: 542
Loc: Manhattan, NYC
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Quote:
To an average Joe, you're a dead man walking. For board members, you're on the light side. Well, you're definitely physically dependent....
I find that a very presumptuous statement to make. I don't see how you could say that he is a dead man walking to the average Joe, when the "average Joe," is more medicated than ever. Have you seen the percentage of American's who are on some form of prescription drug? For the "young," it's like a third of the population. For older people (over 55) it's more like 75%. You may want to check out the numerous recent articles on this subject.
Would he be less of a "dead man walking" to the "average Joe" if he drank a six pack a day? I don't know what average Joe's you are referring to but the one's I know would laugh at such an assertion.
And as far as dependent, well, yeah, he probably is. And Im dependent on coffee and would be miserable should I stop drinking it. Does that mean Im a dead man walking? Or I should stop drinking coffee.
Quote:
So much for what you take now... Have you been escalating your dose? The body notoriously finds it easy to defend against benzos and Soma, and I'd bet that at your current dose they don't have the effects they used to. Those would likely pose more problems than the Norco if you bump their dose up. Within less than a month, that little monkey on your back can become a superchimp.
Having been through a horrible benzo addiction and withdrawal, I cant argue with you there.
Quote:
That all said, I hope you don't get banned. Recreational use is an automatic boot in the butt. You may want to clarify that the buzz is nice, but that you need the meds for legitimate reasons.
Who are you to say he is using recreationally? And let this dude post what the heck he wants. Who are you to tell him how and what to post. You are not a moderator.
Once again the finger pointers have come out. God forbid someone derives some pleasure out of a drug, whether they need the med or not, they are automatically addicts. Forget that. Did you ever think that some level of buzz is part of the INTENTIONAL affects of the drug, especially if the buzz occurs with normal theroputic dosages as it does with many meds? Is it wrong to enjoy that? Please, it sure is better than being depressed all the time. Life is too short....
You think the dude was talking about injecting heroin or something.
Oh, and I like caffeine (among other things), simply for the recreational affects.
Guess Im a dead man walking and about to be banned from the board. Oh, well.
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artmann
Stranger
Reged: 07/23/04
Posts: 2
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I think NYCAT may have misinterpreted what stardog was saying.
There are people out there, stardog happened to call them "Average Joe". It was a reference name for all those "solid citizens" who abhor those who use drugs for other than debilitating pain and those who do use it for pain, well heaven forbid they should feel good while not in pain!!! and that moniker was also for those who believe that if you take any meds that come through "alternate" means (i.e. on-line sites and doctors) and they just happen to also give you a buzz while taking care of your problem.. then there is something wrong and you must be an addict and less a "good citizen".
Regarding the part about saying the meds are needed for pain and not just a buzz... twinkletoes obviously assumed we all here know what she meant, but to someone monitoring.. it might look like "buzz" was the only intent. The admonishment (I assume) was just a reminder to all that if the board is misinterpreted by an outsider that it could be shut down and/or the poster banned.
We are all on the same page here... I don't think anyone means any disrespect.
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Stardog
Member
Reged: 08/28/04
Posts: 195
Loc: Where it all Begins
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Thanks for saying what I would have said, only more eloquently than I would have said it. I don't think our poster is a rec user at all, and I sure hope he/she didn't take it that way.
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