Your story sounds very similar to mine when I first ordered from an IOP. I did it out of despiration too for an illness I could not get proper treatment for. After a few days I totally freaked out. My husband could tell something was troubling me so he asked and I told him that I was ordering valium from an African country. He nearly hit the roof and said my goodness why not just get it imported from Iraq? A few days later I had gotten it with no fanfare either, just an envelope in the mailbox like the rest of them. I don't do IOPs lately either since I am using the US OP route. I don't feel guilty either since it is a doctor who is prescribing my meds from a pharmacy with a DEA license.