I also don't want to get too philisophical or religious (some people get very offended by these discussions for some crazy reason...if you don't agree, just stop reading because I'm about to say something about MY personal religious beliefs...) Flea...I myself was not very religious growing up. I believed in God and all that, but I have never truely believed in conventional religion because all I saw of it growing up was hypocritical. But now, with my child, we have started going to a nondenominational church and I have an entirely new outlook on life. I have studied Buddhism for several years, but as I stated in a previous post it is NOT a religion. Bhudda was a man who was not meant and did not desire to be worshipped. He simply tried to find a simple, peaceful, happy way of living and teach it to the people so we could be truely happy and not WANT so much all the time as we all have a tendency to do...it's human nature. But anyway, I will say a prayer for you as well and I just wanted to throw that in because it sounds to me like if you've ever thought about researching religion a little...now would be the time to do it. I did it during a very bad time in my life...and it made things much easier for me. When I was in the hospital recently the preacher made a special trip to see me and see if he could bring any food to my house and said his wife would love to watch my son if needed if we needed some rest after my release. I was amazed...We haven't even been baptised yet (our next step) so we are not "officially" members, but they have accepted us already as we are. That's another important factor...find a church where you feel accepted and wanted. I have never felt more accepted and appreciated and truely missed if I am not there than I do at our church. Sorry to get so in depth...I know this is totally boring many of you...but I just know from personal experience how that feeling acceptance and worshiping together can really make some horrible times a little more barable. I hope things get better for you...and as I said before, I will also be praying for you. Mel.