Of course, you feel like you need to do something drastic. Trust me, I have to rely upon a University Student Medical Plan (I'm a TA, but not considered an "employee")

I fell down the stairs last year and sprained my ankle. It was a nasty sprain, of the variety where any sense of pressure on the foot literally causes you to collapse. Not even from the pain, but from the pure non-functionality of the joint. The doctor advised me to take some "Nuprin."
Have you spotted nuprin in any local pharmacies lately? This guy was at least ten years out of date with OTC drugs (in name, at least).

I came back and harassed him (politely) explaining that I'd been taking ibuprophen and it t'weren't doing jacksh7t. He relented to give me a script for 15 ultram to go along with my 2 week confinement to crutches. Yeah, that ultram really helped with my traumatic joint injury. Ahem.

Then again, I don't have a gun.